Daughter's loss inspires service
Member helps other parents grieve loss of their babies
By MARY CAROLINE POWERS
Cara Korn's work as a child protective specialist for the state Office of Children and Family Services requires that she listen to heart-wrenching stories of child abuse almost daily.
The skills she uses to do her work - careful listening, empathy and leading conversation in a positive direction - she now uses to help parents deal with the unexpected loss of an infant.
Korn, a member in PEF Region 8, volunteers as co-facilitator of EASE ( Empty Arms Support Effort) which helps parents in the Capital District cope with miscarriage, stillbirth or the death of their newborn.
The support group was founded more than 15 years ago by two women who had suffered such losses. Recently, when they decided they could no longer continue their commitment, EASE faced the possibility of ending its services.
That's when Korn and Liz Schuster, associate counsel in PEF's Legal Department, stepped in. On the third Monday of each month they join with others grieving the loss of a baby to listen, empathize and help lead parents toward healing.
Korn brings her own experience to the task. In September 1992, she and her husband, Carl, lost their newborn daughter, Jenna, to a heart defect. And Schuster lost her firstborn son, William, in 1993 due to premature labor. The two women met at an EASE gathering.
"I was helped a lot by the EASE group," Korn says. "I realized I wasn't alone; I learned coping skills and gained a support network. I want to provide that for others."
Korn and her husband also oversee the work of The Jenna Fund, which they founded shortly after Jenna's death with "start-up" money collected by Cara's co-workers and fellow PEF members.
Since then, more than $20,000 has been raised to help parents deal with the loss of a baby while still in the hospital.
As Korn points out, the death of an infant often is totally unexpected; the mother is rushed to the hospital with no provisions. And when the infant dies, little is available to help the parents record their few final moments with the baby - nothing that will help them remember their child.
"The Jenna Fund has provided cameras and film so they can take a photo of the baby. We give money for a simple blanket and clothing for the child, or to make a memory book that would include a photo, a lock of hair, the baby's footprint," says Korn. "And we've helped defray the cost of a couple of funerals."
Some of the money from the fund has been used to help educate hospital nursing staff about how to deal with grieving parents.
"Now, many more nurses know how to handle the situation and provide grief support at this time of loss," Korn says. "Seven years ago, when Jenna died, just a few nurses knew what to do."
Seven years later, Korn's life is full and busy. She is dedicated to her work and her family, which now includes her 5-year-old daughter, Haley, and 4-year-old son Joshua. And she has a mission to ensure that the short life of a baby girl named Jenna was not lived in vain.
For help, or to help:
To contribute to The Jenna Fund, send a check or money
order to:
Jenna Fund at Albany Medical Center
(Account No. 20-1650-20-50-052000)
Development Office, Room A-119
43 New Scotland Ave.
Albany, NY 12207
For more information about the fund, contact Mary Miller,
head of the bereavement team in the labor and delivery
unit at Albany Medical Center, at (518) 262-3454.
To contact the Empty Arms Support Effort (EASE), call
(518) 438-2655. It meets the third Monday of each month
from 7 to 9 p.m. at the Ronald McDonald House, 139 South
Lake Ave., Albany.